Guest Post: Christian Dealbreakers

I came across this blog post earlier today and it really caught my attention. I wrote to both the author of the post and the author of the blog it was on and they both said I could repost it here.

So here it is.

It was posted here: 

And was written by the author of the blog A Woman’s Guide to Women: A Blog for Men

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Episode #22 of the Wise Guy Wednesday series features Sharideth Smith, a humor writer who mostly ghost writes and has a lot work that appears on e-How.

She’s got two kids and a husband.  All of which she likes most of the time.  You can find her ridiculous advice to single men at A Woman’s Guide to Women: A Blog for Men. I guarantee you’ll laugh out loud and maybe even learn a thing or two.

On my blog I have a series of Relationship Deal Breakers. The idea being there are really very few things that cannot be overcome or compromised on when it comes to keeping a relationship in tact. No, loving vs. hating Good ‘N Plenty’s is not one of them. Though that may require some counseling.

The same is true for our faith and denominational boundaries. My being okay with wearing jeans to church does not negate my salvation even if you think a woman should only wear skirts with Keds and bobby socks. Totally not a deal breaker.

Real deal breakers only include how you define who Jesus is, whether you believe the Bible is that actual word of God and how salvation occurs.

There’s an easy test to figure out if you have crested a hill worth dying on. Ask yourself “Does this change who God is or the role of His Son in my life?” If the answer is no, you do not have a deal breaker. Which is exactly what I told my son when he asked what would happen if we found out aliens were real. Score!

Everything else falls into one or more of these 3 categories:

1. Preference

Skirts vs. my evil pants. Hymns vs. CCM. Cathedral vs. meeting in a bar. Pentecostal vs. would rather eat glass than raise my hands in church. These are preferences. We all have our comfort zones and there is very little more personal than how we choose to approach God. The important thing is that we do approach Him.

2. Discourse

Calvinism vs. Arminianism. Drinking vs. T-Totalling. Old Earth vs. Young Earth.

Democrat vs. Republican. These things are up for discussion. Talking good. Fighting bad. We should have open discourse about anything and everything. Iron sharpens iron and all that. We should constantly be increasing in wisdom and a good way to do that is to have open, non-hostile conversation with those who interpret things differently than we do.

3. Grace

Oh boy. I get in trouble sometimes by reminding my fellow believers that the only people Jesus ever got really mad at and condemned were those who professed piety while sitting in arrogant judgment over others. Yeah. Think about that. He didn’t offer the woman at the well judgment and conditions for His approval. He offered her grace. We need to stop sitting in judgment over those who find their way to Christ differently than we do.

If you ask Christians about who has hurt them most, the majority will point the finger at their brothers and sisters in Christ. How profoundly sad.

How do we fix this? Simple. Always choose to err on the side of Love God and Love Others. If those two things are most important to God, then shouldn’t they also be most important to us? Let everything else fall away like chaff.

Have you ever been judged for worshipping in a certain way or holding to a specific doctrine?

Is there someone you have sat in judgment over who you need to ask forgiveness from?